fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just want nice things and good sex
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
