She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
