What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i barfeds in our rink
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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