i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
