yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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