He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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