My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
