is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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