I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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