you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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