brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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