I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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