I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
We have started to decorate penises.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
