Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
