Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
