when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
