guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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