Don't you send me to vm
I love black thongs
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
