I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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