omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
