Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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