found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Alive.
So much puke
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
