problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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