the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
