meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
All the doctor said was why
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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