He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
