I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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