talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
