I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
