I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
The struggles of a small town man whore
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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