How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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