he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
