Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Blood and glitter go together right?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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