Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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