so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize