Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
