i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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