S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
