I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
