Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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