Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
