I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
