Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
