this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
You're earring is so big in my mouth
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize