okay pat passed out under dana's car
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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