I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
