Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
