8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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