Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
