I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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