Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
