I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
